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5 Signs Your Relationship is Over

I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions - Stephen Covey

The relationship that we build with someone is an important one. We invest ourselves physically and emotionally into building the relationship and with time, everyone that is significant in our lives-siblings, parents and friends also invest in the relationship. Your significant other and all their families and baggage become a part of your family and experience.

The relationship grows from a mere relationship into a superb relationship that forms part of a family and community. However, some relationships are simply not meant to last. They aren’t going anywhere due to certain situations and incompatibilities. It is difficult to measure love and know when love has gone out of relationship and there is nothing left to sustain the relationship. If your relationship has hit a plateau or is heading downhill, then it may start giving out signals telling you it’s time to call it quits and explore new horizons. Here are five top signs that your relationship could be over and done with:

You don’t trust them

When trust is lost in a relationship, it is likely to herald the end of that relationship. Very few relationships will survive a breach in trust.

There are many ways to know you have lost trust in someone else. For example, if in the past you trusted them unreservedly and now you find yourself increasingly questioning their motives, then the trust is gone and it is only a matter of time before you call it quits in the relationship. The situation is particularly bad when there is mutual distrust in which case it will be extremely difficult for both of you to make your way back into a trusting co-existence once more.

You are picking fights

If you are frequently picking up fights with your significant other over the most mundane things, it may be a sign of irritation or simply being fed up with them and this may be a signal that it is time to call it quits. Maybe it’s time to wind up things with your partner and move on.

Sex is Nonexistent in the Relationship

A sexually healthy relationship that is compatible with your tastes and libidos is one of the key ingredients to success. If your bedroom routine has plunged from hot and exciting passions to dull and bland sexual routine that feels more like taking a bath than making love, then it is time to begin asking the big WHY?

It is normal for partners to see ebb in the sexual desire but this should not be long lasting. If the sexual fritz is taking longer than normal and the bland sexual routine is becoming routine, then you may need to make some big decisions regarding your future with your partner together. It may be the time to end it. Either they have found a new partner or are simply not sexually attracted to you anymore – or both!

You are not making future plans together

You have big plans for the future. You are planning to move to a new city or new country, go to university or start a new business. But you don’t see where your partner fits in the scheme of things.

When you are making big plans and you are not factoring in your significant other into these plans, then you have already pushed them away psychologically. You are only in the relationship physically but you had long called it quits emotionally.

When you are in love with someone and in a relationship for the long haul, you will always factor in your partner in all your plans for the future even if only to pick their opinion when they will be playing a largely peripheral role. If you find yourself unable or unwilling to do that, then they are certainly no longer a part of the things that you hold most dear and you may need to severe the relationship and move on with your life.

There is a breakdown in communication

This is one of the most visceral signs that the two of you are no longer compatible in the relationship. If you struggle to talk to your partner or even look them in the eye or even struggle to start and keep a conversation ongoing organically like you used to do, then the relationship has hit a breaking point.

It is a natural to have a breakdown in communication after a disagreement or a fight with your partner but your trust and connection with one another should overcome this after a few days or weeks depending on each partner’s temperament.

If you are however having a persistent communication breakdown that lasts months or even years, then you need to call it quits and move on with your life instead of being stuck in perpetual unhappiness.

These are some of the most important signs that your relationship has hit a tipping point and that you may need to make some big decisions about your future together. But there are many other feelers that you will take note of if your relationship is not heading in the right direction.

For example, is your partner still making you their top priority? Do they ever do anything nice to you anymore? Are they shrouded in mystery inside an enigma that you can barely figure them out or their motives? Look out for these and make the right call to consider putting an end to a toxic relationship.

Frances Masters

Frances Masters is a BACP accredited psychotherapist with over 30,000 client hours of experience. Follow her @fusioncoachuk, or visit The Integrated Coaching Academy for details about up coming training.